GLASTONBERRY TOOFAHSANDNINE WOS GAAN ON?

Michael Jackson died when I was at Glastonbury. That's weird. What made it weirder was that I was drunk-dancing to a gypsy band with a 60-year-old man in a fez making everyone sit down like little children. Then I had a creppe, which is strange enough in itself.

Ok, so basically - if you weren't there this year, you missed out, because it was DAMN good. Highlights/Lowlights/Things of note:

• BLURBLURBLURBLURBLURBLURBLUR
• GaGa - Songs = amazing, her as a person = excrutiating. "On the 26th July 2009..." MONTH FAIL
• Mum tattoos
• Paracetamol - £20 wasted
• Lads - "PARTAY!"/"Do you wanna play a drinking game?"/"Let's go fucking mental!" All came into their own this weekend. I quite like being a lad. Except when I'm with lads.
  
• Sleep deprivation. I slept for 12 hours this morning, cut short only by builders starting work at 7-FUCKING-30, and that was about the same amount I got all weekend.
• People complimenting my moves. People complimenting my clothes. In fact, just people. I have never seen the British public so welcoming, charming or helpful as they were this weekend. Even the Australians were nice! It made me feel good about the world again.
• Talking about Shostakovich at 4AM, after the oxygen bar.
• Spending the whole of thursday-saturday saying "bonkers". Then seeing Dizzee. Then saying it even more frequently.
  
• Slime. Seriously, monday morning was just horrifying. So much mud, but such a hot sun. My plimsoles will never be salvaged.
• The tea party at Avalon. Big up Chol Theatre on that one, those cakes kept me going all day.
• The Boss - the lights of the entire festival twinkling behind the Pyramid, cheap whisky, 'Born to Run'; good, good times.
  
• Overpriced everything - £2 for an orange ice on the hottest day of the year?! Yeah, that's right, you will let me have it for £1.75. Sadistic bitch.
• I fell in like.

But mere facets of the 4-day bonanza. What a time. London feels way, way too unpleasant right now, the withdrawal symptoms are kicking hard.

Next year I'm sleeping in your tent.
xxx